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 Now I have to move. I look for houses, they are hard to come b(u)y in my price range. Very hard. More so in the area I have known.

You have to know I don't use Public Transport and am unsure I will be able to keep my car, his car, our car... So it is important I love in an area close to the few I know.

I looked for months, now I have 6 months left.

What would be an adventure with my 2 kittens now is just him and me.

So I have to find a house with a garden, he is a kitten that loves the outdoors. He is always outside.

I find a house. I want to sign. They tell me someone else signed.

It gets put back on the market. I want to sign. They tell me someone else is going to sign.

3rd time, it gets put back on the market. I have still no income, officially. But through connection I get a talk with the owner and he accepts. Since January in Flanders you no longer get to have people stand warrant for you, but he accepts anyway.

My last kitten is hurt. Instead of helping him, the vets make it worse... He weakens, but I have to move anyway.

My table, has 1 leg now, my kitten...

I move, as I knew the house proves hard to heat. 1 heating element for 7 rooms, the rest gets heated with electrical heaters which I don't have money for. I do have our own wood-stove installed though. But the winter is horrible, in the bedroom it feels as if a window is always open. But I have my little friend with me.... 

But he doesn't regain his strength. He gets dispirited. Then as my ex is on another vacation with his gf and the exact day CoVid was made official here in Belgium, after months of complications and suffering my little friend leave this earth... and all I could do was stand by and watch....

I don't want to explain in depth about my kittens, it hurts too much....

All that has to be understood to understand my desperation is that I had 4 pillars upon which my entire happiness stood.


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