I do not exist without the other.

This is something I don't know if other people feel too.
But when I do something, it is the fact someone else sees me do it or listens to me tell me how I did it that makes it become more worthy.
As if on my own, by myself, I do not truly exist. I leave no print behind.
But as soon as someone acknowledges what I did, likes it, or just sees it the print is placed.

This morning I woke up feeling crushingly alone, more sharply than ever.
I lack that framework in which I used to function.
He is out and about in this world, always staying at people, working, running about.
He wants to be alone, but I bet he wouldn't want to be lonely.
One has to have been lonely to know it has little or nothing to do with being alone.

I hunger for someone to look into my eyes. Someone to touch me. Someone to smile at me. Someone to hold me. That someone being him.
But he has not desire whatsoever to give me that for he gets this from others.
He is not lacking, I am.

Right now it is snowing hard and has been, off and on for days. But I have no 1 to share it with...
Everything I experienced alone. Everything.
What if I would want to suicide?
I have now become 1 of those people they would find a week later.
No 1 would miss me. I have isolated myself so fully at least a week would pass.
That is initself patehtic but not that much of an issue. But what about the kittens?
He has to look after them, now!!!